The making of a novel, part 6—how writing is like parenting

Granted, I only have one child, but all of my friends with multiple kids say the same thing: the second is nothing like the first. In many cases, it seems, they’re the complete opposite.

Having finished one book and begun another, I’m tempted to say the same is true of writing. With Dell’s story, I knew I needed to do a lot of research to get the details right. But I didn’t want to be doing research; I wanted to write. So I started writing scenes in random order, working on the ones that didn’t require medical knowledge—just a solid feel for the characters and their emotions. After I put in the time to learn what I needed to know, I built the structure of the story around the treatment journey and fit the character scenes in where they made sense.

That seemed to work well for me. Only a few scenes couldn’t find a place in the narrative, and it made writing from the beginning go faster and more smoothly. So as I embarked on this next story, I figured I might as well approach it the same way. But my second novel, the little bugger, is nothing like the first.

Rae’s story doesn’t need the framework that Dell’s did, which is good on the one hand because it gives me more freedom, but bad on the other because I don’t have a structure to guide me along. I didn’t edit the last book as I went. But I’m about an eighth of the way into this one and I already feel the need to revise what I’ve got.

We’ll see what happens when I get to the third book. Maybe a pattern will emerge and one of these two will be the outlier. But I have a sneaking suspicion that—like kid #3—it will be its own unique blend of challenges and joys as well.

Resolve to be kind

If you’re looking to spread more kindness in the coming year, here are some ideas for easy resolutions to incorporate into your everyday life.

1. When you buy something from a vending machine, put in more money than you need.

2. Park further away so someone else can park closer.

3. Use thank-you notes for more than gifts: write a note of appreciation to teachers, coaches, doctors, librarians, etc.

4. Use AmazonSmile to donate to a charity of your choice.

5. Embrace bouquets: give them to the office staff at work or school, send flowers to someone on their birthday, or bring them to the nurses’ station of a hospital for whichever patient they think could use cheering up.

6. Leave copies of your favorite books in public places for other people to take and enjoy.

7. Dedicate a day, week, or month of compliments—see how many you can hand out.

8. When you bake cookies or other treats, double the recipe and take the extras to neighbors, the police or fire station, or your pediatrician’s office.

9. Donate food, toys, or clothing to a food bank, an animal shelter, or a children’s hospital.

10. Treat a friend to dinner.

11. When you take a walk around your neighborhood, take a notepad with you. Write complimentary notes about people’s homes and gardens.

12. Don’t be afraid to have fun while doing something kind: join a wine club or a culinary “of the month” club and share the bounty with friends or colleagues.

No act of kindness is too small. Making kindness a part of your daily routine helps keep it top of mind. Soon you’ll see all kinds of opportunities to do a good deed.